Tuesday, August 5, 2008

I'm So Full of Fail

Just like that pathetic marketing guy Neku insults, I am so full of fail. How and why? I lost every life I had in Super Mario Bros. 3 in the 3rd world, the water world. Big buford ate me, I hate him. Who/What is "Big Buford? That's what I used to call the giant Petey Pirahna (or it may actually be Petey Pirahna) that leaps from mellow waters of SMB 3 and eats Mario (Before today mine used to prefer Luigi).

How did I find myself staying up late in the night and playing Super Mario Bros. 3? I needed to play it, my body told me so. I've had this need going off all year, but I finally succumbed to it yesterday and downloaded the game from the Virtual Console. I Iove the VC's convenience,the legality of it is cool too. I may still be seen as idiot for buying it.I only have the game and emulator for it on my pc, my DS, my GBA, my flash drives, my e-mail, and even on my Wii. Even though I have emulators and roms I rarely use them. To even be able to play the game on my DS or GBA means I own hardware capable of pirating games, but like a nut I still buy games. The last DS game Ibought was Crosswords, with the two before that being Apollo Justice and Advance Wars: Days of Ruin. I don't remember the specifics of how I came to own Ninja Gaiden: Dragon Sword, but I beleve I found it on a bus or in a rest room. I'm in college andI can definitely use the money I spend on non-necessities on better things like hookers or pop, but part of being a gamer is collecting. I choose to collect games as part of my hobby.No, I don't wear plastic gloves and keep them vacuum sealed, or only turn them on test them, I play them off the real carts and I read through the manuals. I just love owning things, I'm too attached to this world. It's also nice being able to back-up my game saves as I would have been shit out of luck when my original DS (a phat) got drenched in a car wash when the sun roof was opened partway through the process. The game was fried, would not load ever again. Or rather it rusted and I took to long to replace my DS and replaced it. I sold it on ebay honestly, didn't get a lt from it, but I kept my box and manual, turns out there was a way to clean it and get it working again and the person I sold it to knw exactly what to do. Congrats to him, he scored games the way I often do. Beedrill. Wasn't I supposed to be blogging about my epic sucking t SM 3?

So anyway, I finally play the game, and the first thing I notice is how off the graphics are. After all, I only played NES version for a short amount of time, I was quickly upgraded to All Stars and actually played America's 2 a lot of the time befor 3 arrived in my house. At 5-6 years old I was a beast, the only thing that stopped me was one stage in the Ice world of 5 (or was it 6, I think 6 is the sky one) and world 8. Yes, I have never beaten the game, my favorite game of all time. The game I longed to play for nearly 8 months. Eight months ago I played Super Mario Galaxy. It's a beautiful game and wonderfully executed, but the 3D Mario's have nearly as strong of a hold on me as the 3D Zeldas. In fact, I stopped playing Galaxy within a week or so of buying it and didn't start again until last month. I had 23 stars before I forgot about the game and flocked to No More Heroes, now I'm up to about 110 of them. I want the full ending and the satisfaction of finally completing a 3D Mario game. Sunshine, I stopped at 114 shines, my memory card was erased by evil and I said to hell with the game and many others.

So Galaxy resparked my mario gene, after all, Galaxy is influenced by SMB 3 a lot. Both are games full of style, challenged, and worthless Luigi. After I loaded the game up and quickly trounced most of the first world I'm killed on the airship. I decided to taunt Bowser's kid (In SMB3 the first seven are still alive, Mario and Luigi kill them in the sequel: Super Mario World). I got anfry and ran into a bullet bill. I won the 3rd time through. 2nd world, I breeze through everything, ven the evil sun which I killed cold heartedly. I lose on the air ship again. Besides being frustrated with the air shipsI'm in love with the game again and am amazed that I remember so many secrets. I even discovered a new thing and glitch that lets me exploit donut blocks to keep them floating. 3rd world I thought I was going to bowl it over like I almost did the previous two. I never expected to have any trouble with any par of the game until worlds five or 6. In evel 7 or 8, that evil fish continually eats me. He whittles me down to one life, I even have a hammer so that I won't have to do the level, but my pride wouldn't let me use it then. fat abstard eats me again, but at 0 lives I'm still aliv. How blessedmuct I be? He gets me immediately, I didn't even gt to jump on the green koopas back. I am so full of fail. Can't play SMB 3 nor properly stay on topic in a simple Brawl. I'll edit this tomorrow from a real pc,I"m on the Wii channel. I will ne\ot chabnge any text,I will simply create paragraphs by parting the run-on paragraphs.

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